You Have Spoken: The Essential Food Groups

The polls have closed and all the votes have been counted. 

Without question, in a year of the passage of the most radical reform in American health care since the Medicare act, the number one issue on the minds of health care workers is – hold the drum roll – food.

Salary, benefits, work conditions, and even the foremost of all issues, parking, all take a second seat to food: the fuel, the nutrients, the comfort, the indigestion. 

I am a bit surprised that comments about the initial food blog did not include defenders of the traditional fare eaten by hospital employees.  

No defense of the hidden benefits of transfats or the delight in eating a cheese burger in 24 seconds; no cry to maintain high body mass just in case of famine or being left abandoned for days on the Lodge service drive. 

No claim that the combination of white flour, cheese, pepperoni and tomato sauce actually promotes vascular health. 

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The Essential Food Groups for Hospital Employees

I will not claim to having performed an exhaustive study of the essential food groups that fuel the doctors, nurses and others working within a hospital. 

I have made several observations in the field as part of my due diligence and learning, and I feel comfortable sharing with you these elements, sans food pyramid.

The Essential Foods:

1. Donuts
2. Pizza
3. Coffee, Mountain Dew or other more exotic caffeinated energy beverages
4. Any fried food, most importantly French fries or chicken
5. Hamburgers
6. Chips, or high-fat, cheese-containing and/or salt-laden snacks

Preferably, meals are constructed to include at least three of the essential foods, fit into the pocket of a white coat, and can be eaten in less than four minutes. (Or, more scientifically, the intake rate of 12,000 calories per minute). 

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